


Eleanor

by merycula (thanksillpass)



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Not Canon Compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-27
Updated: 2013-09-27
Packaged: 2017-12-27 18:40:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/982272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thanksillpass/pseuds/merycula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>so did you know that Wade had a daughter?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i wanted fluff daddy wade not angst daddy wade

"You have a what," Peter deadpanned looking at Wade through narrowed eyes.

"A daughter," Wade said cautiously, stepping aside to reveal a bored-looking girl with black hair and dark olive skin. "Peter, this is Eleanor."

Peter stared at the girl, which was probably less than cute, but he really couldn’t wrap his head around this. She looked around ten years old and it made Peter simultaneously wonder about Wade’s age and freak out internally because Wade had a ten-or-so year old  _daughter_! A daughter that was currently standing at Peter’s doorstep and giving him unimpressed looks.

"You probably have questions, so… mind inviting us in?" Wade mumbled, clearly uncomfortable.

Peter actually did mind. Jesus Christ on a cracker,  _a kid!_

“ _This_  is Peter? ” Eleanor asked, not hiding her shock and disappointment.

Peter spluttered indignantly. "Rude!"

"Yeah, she takes after her mother, I keep telling her to keep her mouth shut but-" Wade cut himself off under the stern looks from both his child and his boyfriend. "Yeah, okay." He clasped his hands and grinned. "So, Peter, have I ever told you about Carmelita?"

"You most certainly did not," Peter gritted through his teeth, letting them inside the house. 

"See, Carmelita, sweet girl that she is, had her way with me, left me brokenhearted, and had a kid which she didn’t tell me about. Yeah, no, she did tell me a few years back, she wanted child support and stuff, I just kind of… didn’t believe her? I mean look at this kid, she looks  _nothing_  like me!”

Peter run his hand through his hair and sat down on the couch with a sigh. “So what makes you think she’s yours now?”

"Her incredible intellect, blinding beauty, and complete lack of sense of humor that she obviously took after me," Wade snapped taking off his mask. Peter’s eyes unconsciously went to Eleanor, anticipating her reaction, but she seemed as unimpressed with Wade’s looks as with everything else. "What do you think, dumbass? I asked Bob to do the tests."

Peter hummed noncommittally and leaned back on the couch. Eleanor was looking at him suspiciously for a while before taking Wade’s hand in hers and tugging gently. Wade leaned in and looked at her questioningly.

Peter couldn’t believe the way this little unsuspecting creature was looking at Wade - with absolutely nothing but childish curiosity and awe that should probably ascribed to, well, meeting her father. Peter didn’t know what he’d do if Eleanor looked at Wade with anything resembling fear or disgust.

"What is it, doodle bug?" Wade asked without any hint of impatience which somehow melted Peter’s heart.

"You said your boyfriend was smart and funny and, quote, a total spiderminx, unquote. Are you sure we’re at the right house?"

"Yeah, she’s your daughter alright. She definitely has your flawless social skills."

"She also likes tacos," Wade offered with a shrug.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prequel to Eleanor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and the Christy was like: I want the prequel to this where Deadpool gives Bob urine samples and tells him to find out if he really is the baby daddy by “I don’t know, Google it or some shit”

"That’s not really how it works, Mr. Wilson…," Bob stammered, accepting an already opened can of soda gratefully. "I’m gonna need blood samples and much, _much_  more than Google…”

"You’re not coming anywhere near me with a needle, you psycho. You work with what I give you - my piss."

"Uh, alright Mr. Wilson. I’ll do my best. So where is the um- the urine sample?" Bob asked and cleared his dry throat before lifting the can to his mouth.

"You’re drinking it. Now get to work, I need to hit the toy store just in case."


End file.
